“I belong to English Department”. That was she said to me when I asked her which department she belonged to. I really did not realize that she was even has very very closed registration number with me! (the variation of those damn number then maybe can explain why I chose my phone number I use now)
My personal love story starts on August 2001; we had a party for freshmen held by the senior. She and I were in the same group. Unfortunately, I did not have a single picture of it. On that time, in some particular moment I touch her hair that she said I was the first boy who did it, what a surprising moment. I did surprise! I thought that was so usual, furthermore, we were friends in groups! Maybe she thought what I said personally to her was flattering, I remember that was I always do to someone I want to show my admiration, someone who I respect.
I was always being bad boys there, took the punishment, grudged by senior, etc. however, I said then to her that it was all of the parts of our beautiful moments, it was all our story, happy story.
I remember that I did not able to differentiate IMPAS-B and KOMPAS, that was because I did not pay attention but talked with her. Moreover, as a ‘macho wannabe as other guys dream of’, I took all the punishment, not my teammate. Ha ha ha., what a wonderful stories, for retell, not to redo.
We belonged to same groups again when our ED senior took us to Belangian 2 weeks later (FYI: Amed has the collection of photos of that moment). For those two fuckin’ stupid weeks, I felt I was getting closer to her, and I thought if I proposed her to be my girlfriend, she would not reject me. There so much story to write for those two beautiful looks alike weeks, also my meeting with my friends that will then coloring my entire life.
I was proposing her to be my girlfriend in a place that I will later hardly reach. It was a summer, water in Belangian river were in low level, so that we could talk, in ‘when you ‘shoot’ me stony waters’ like she wrote to me.
I had burnt the letter she wrote to me; I totally cannot remember the whole things she wrote, I only remember (if I am not mistaken), “in your birthday, our romance had begun”. It is (maybe has) grammatical error, fixed by this person.
Yeah, yeah, Since September 13 2001, I had girlfriend, I had someone who jealous of me, angry to me, ask me not to smoke in front of her, bla…bla…bla…. Nice moment right? Of course, until Judgment Day it will always be nice moments to remember, I will neither dispute nor doubt it.
By the time going, as a skeptic person, I started to doubt her. I doubt her love when she chose to hang out with her friends rather than me; she kept connecting with her former boyfriends, expelled me when final tests were getting closer, etc.
I realized that I doubt her when but she truly loved me when I read again the letters she sent to me, letters she wrote with friends called TEARS! She cried when I gave her chocolates, things that I gave to others. I promised to only has her as my girlfriend, in fact I did not. Jah, let us skip this. I do not like this part.
There are so many things to write, because we had five years in relationship. In those years, we passed so many things. She cried when I lost my phone because it contains our number in series, my last SIM card number that lost were 026 while she had 027. She cried when I stopped staying in boarding house. She cried when she felt I am far away from her. Moreover, I consider it all as bullshit, I thought her tears were just an act, how stupid skeptic person I was!
She did not like songs I usually listen to, but she said I was then, made her love my music too. She taught me to type in Microsoft Words. I usually gave her our soundtracks of our love story. Celebrating my nineteenth birthday, also in same date we celebrate our first anniversary of committing together was a beautiful moment. Day by day she and I passed on August 2004 was wonderful and amazing experience, 2003 was almost fulfilled by tears and it is like a rainbow, coloring our life.
I am then feel that I am sleepy, actually I want to write my personal love story as long as I could, but I feel I have lost my spirit. I will upload our picture, but I must scan that picture first, I will ask Amed to help.
I forgot to write this: I dedicated this post to August, months where I first met her, months that I fall in love; months that I met girls I like (love?). In addition, this post is a sign, that I am now totally able to forget her, forget our love story especially bad times we passed together with anger and humiliating each other. Last but not least, I forgive her for what she has ever done to me. I want to say thanks for all your kind. THANK YOU
NOTE: Maybe you, all the reader need more than dictionary to understand the last paragraph, because you need intuition. Ha ha ha
UPDATE: I have scanned the photo of us, it was taken October 2002. You may find it here.
Eh, siapa yang sign in ke blog ini? Kayanya itu diatas bukan tulisan saya. Pakai bahasa Inggris lagi? Jangan jangan ada yang iseng ngepost tulisan jahanam diatas? Kunyuk, ah biar lah, sekalian update tulisan di blog? Selamat malam dunia, selamat malam Banjarbaru….
(pas megang stick buat main NFS, malah ga jadi ngantuk. Nampaknya bakalan berlanjut pada track track jahanam NFS ketimbang tidur nich.He he he)